|Pen & Ink Fine Art By Doug Ashby|
I am not sure if anyone knows I venture outside. My path is pretty complicated and took many years to work out. Years of prying and poking about to find the weak spots. What exactly it was so long ago that drove us inside is still a mystery to me. There is nothing in our oral histories about it. I am hoping to find something here, in the real world. However, on a night like this I am more inclined to just sit and be peaceful then search. Inside we are encouraged often to rest, to meditate, to simply be. Nothing though compares to the solitude found outside.
You might be wondering if I am the only one from the inside that has found their way out. No I am not. It's just that inside life is made easy and comfortable, and many do not want to disrupt that. There is something though tugging at a few of us that recently came of age. Something that is not nourished on the inside. When we speak about these feelings the elders become very nervous and dismiss our ideas as foolish. Those that do feel this way quickly came to realize that pushing further to the elders, or in council, would only be met with resistance. Or worse a label as treasonous. So we found another way. Like I said though there are not that many that want for more answers. Answers we were denied growing up.
Tonight though I am not searching for those answers. Although I feel it deep within that they are here, outside the cocoon. Perhaps what I will find, if anything at all, will simply serve to reinforce the prevailing attitudes on the inside. That is just it though, I can not simply accept those attitudes and ideas and I need to search for more. I just can not accept that all of our history was spent escaping a terror so great it forced us into a quasi prison. For that is truly what the inside is. At this moment however I want to just be. Just be free.
I hope you enjoy,